Up and down!

Why is it whenever I feel like I make a few steps forward, I take even more backwards? I give my problems over to the Lord, only to take them back. It seems like I do this over and over again.

I've had some weird emotions come up the last few days that I really feel are the Devil trying to keep me down. I've been even been getting upset at the stupidest things and blowing things out of proportion in my own mind.

When I take something on in my head, it seems to run through it until there is a solution. The problem is that the things in my life that are not going right, are things that can not be figured out. Hence, I hit a wall of frustration. Then add on top of it, if I mistake a statement or situation then I can totally over think things until I become a mess.

Tonight, God reminded me that I have to give things over to Him. I still believe that letting God totally lead is a hard thing to do, but I realize that I can't do it. I can't take on the issues that are in my life right now. They are all things that can't be figured out.

It once again reminds me of having the faith of a child. I remember times where as a child I never questioned that things were going to be alright, because I knew that Mom and Dad had them under control. Do I have less faith in God? Can I trust Him to work things out? Has he ever let me down before?

I know the answers to these questions and yet I still have to remember to give my burdens over to the Lord. He knows how things will work out. I have no clue.

I think the real issue with us giving things over to God is that we want our will to be done.

"If I can meddle in this a little bit I can turn things my way!"
"If I can just add a little guilt it will help them change their mind!"
"If I pray harder God will have to heal him!"
"If I call in a couple favors or talk up my experience I'll get that job!"

Like God needs my help to do anything! I have to remember that my desires are not always God's desires. God is never going to force me to his way. He might heavily persuade me, but he will not force me. I believe that when I don't do God's will that it changes the "better" outcome that God wanted for us.

I believe that God wanted Jonah to work to save the people of Nineveh. When Jonah finally went he was halfhearted about it and later sat and waited for God to destroy the city. But the people of Nineveh repented and turned from their evil ways. Imagine how different it would have been if Jonah had truly followed God's path. He would have joined in rejoicing with the people there instead of being upset that God did not destroy the city.

Jonah 3:10-4:1

When God saw what they did and how they turned from their evil ways, he had compassion and did not bring upon them the destruction he had threatened. But Jonah was greatly displeased and became angry.

How many times do we become angry when things do not go our way. We have to remember that God is in control. He works things out for His glory. I believe that I have to lay down these burdens everyday to keep from becoming angry about them in the future. I know that God has my back! He's is looking out for my best interest. I believe that God has a blessing out there for me!

Lord,

As I sit and recommit my burdens over to you, I pray that you take them one by one and do your will with them. Give me the trust in You that I had as a child! Guide me in what I need to do. I praise you for giving me glimpses of how you have worked in my life in the past, this gives me more confidence in the future. I know that you will not let me down. Be with my prayer requests, Lord. Please help me keep my chin up, looking toward you. Keep a praise on my lips and renew your love and strength in my heart.

I love You,

Brie!