Blogs come and blogs go...
I read once in a blog that blogging just to blog is not what blogging is about. So instead I'm going to start a new blog to get deeper into me. I'm making God in charge of this blog and the time I spend here will be my time with Him. If you don't like that click on that next blog arrow in the top right hand corner and go somewhere!
Tonight as I sit here contemplating life I feel apprehensive about the next turn my life will take. I'm finding it very hard to communicate with God because I feel I have shut Him out so much. I want God to be closer and yet I feel the urge to want to stay in control. I know I can't have it both ways and yet I tend to let God go instead of letting go.
Do I subconsiously want God to change for me? I mean I always have to be in control of things, make sure things go off without a hitch. Controling life, school work. EVERYTHING! What do I want? Am I really wanting God to take my everything? Am I that trusting today?
I'm walking down my non-path right now. I feel the scrapes of the thorn bushes on my side, stumbling over the rocks in the creekbed. So many things are in my way, and yet a trudge forward. Not really sure where I am going right now. I'm still not trusting because I can still see I'm walking along that babbling stream. So there are no steps of faith, no give up of control, no letting go.
Where am I going?
2 comments:
You identifying what are your 'faults' is the first step towards realizing your dreams. I am guilty of this at times in that I rely on my own strength and toss God to the corner. The second and greatest step to getting to where you need to be (not where you want to be) is taking Him (God) out of that corner, dusting Him off and starting afresh your relationship with Him. Those are first few steps To fulfiling your God-given purpose in life which will ultimately lead to true happiness.
From my heart, to yours,
Akhenaton
Thanks for your comments, Akhenaton. I'm really trying to talk with God more. I want so much for Him to take the lead, because when I do really seem to mess things up!
Brie
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